Title: "Leyla & The Search For Mulder"

Author: Little Albatross (monicaxrohrer@gmail.com)

Dates: May 1, 2003

Distribution: We Shall Not Forget and XFMU. Anyone else, please ask.

Rating: PG

Category: humor, DSR

Timeline: during the events of "Within/Without"

Spoilers: Requiem/Within/Without

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it. All 
X-Files characters belong to Chris Carter, Ten-
Thirteen Productions and 20th Century FOX 
Broadcasting.

Summary: Agent Leyla Harrison panics.

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FADE IN: 
 
INT. DEPUTY DIRECTOR ALVIN KERSH'S OUTER OFFICE – DAY

Agent John Doggett steps out of the Deputy Director's 
office and passes a young blond female agent who has 
just entered the office. As he passes her, she sneers 
at him in a very immature way. 

Agent Leyla Harrison goes up to Kersh's sectary, 
Judy.

"I need to speak with the Deputy Director please." 
Agent Harrison demands.

"Let me see if he's busy. What's your name?" Judy 
asks of Agent Harrison.

"Special Agent Leyla Harrison." Harrison answers.

Judy gives her a questioning look, she hasn't heard 
of an Agent Harrison before. She hits the intercom 
button.

"Sir, do you have time to speak with an Agent Leyla 
Harrison?" Judy asks.

"Agent Harrison? Never heard of her." Kersh replied 
through the intercom. "Not right now. I'm busy moving 
my things into my new office."

"Yes sir." Judy says into the intercom, then looks up 
at Agent Leyla Harrison. "I'm sorry Agent Harrison, 
the Deputy Director is busy."

"Don't give me that!" Harrison yells. "I need to 
speak with him. It's of grave importance!"

Judy just looks at Harrison, she's not buying it.

"I'm sorry Agent Harrison, you'll have to come at 
another time." Judy tells her.

Harrison gives out an impatient sigh and looks at 
Kersh's closed office door, then at Judy, and back at 
Kersh's closed office door. Judy is busy looking 
something up on her computer when Agent Harrison 
quickly darts into Kersh's office. 

INT. KERSH'S OFFICE

Harrison runs in, slamming the door behind her, 
alerting both Judy and Kersh. Harrison locks the 
door. Judy can be heard trying the lock. 

Harrison turns around to face Deputy Director Alvin 
Kersh. He does not look happy with her.  
 
"Sir, you can not have Agent Doggett lead the 
investigation to find Agent Mulder." Harrison tells 
him.

"He's a great Agent." Kersh gives her a look. "And 
I'm sure the same can't be said about you."

"You are so mean!" She yells at him.

Kersh doesn't know how to talk to someone who is this 
immature.

"Agent Harrison, right?" Kersh asks.

"Yes." 
 
"Ok. Agent Harrison, I'm going to ask you to leave my 
office now." Kersh says. "I do not have time for 
whatever you find important." 
 
"But-"
 
"Leave." Kersh says.

Leyla stands there with her lower lip pouting out. 
Kersh gives her a look, and she leaves, very upset.

CUT TO:

INT. FBI HALLWAY

Agent Harrison is making her way down the hallway, 
towards the waiting area where the investigation for 
Mulder is being held. To her happy surprise, she sees 
Agent Dana Scully throwing a cup of water on to Agent 
John Doggett. 

Agent Scully leaves the room, leaving Agent Doggett 
wet. Harrison happily comes up to Agent Scully.

"Agent Scully, I'm so happy you don't like that task 
force leader too. He's a threat to you and Agent 
Mulder." Harrison says.

Scully looks at her.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Scully asks 
her. "I don't not like Agent Doggett."

"But… yes you do. I saw you throw water on him." 
Harrison says.

"Yeah, wouldn't you?" Scully asks. "He's hot, I had 
to cool him off somehow. I couldn't control myself. I 
kept seeing visions of him wet, and I didn't want to 
just leave it as visions. I wanted to see him wet. 
There is just something about that man and water…" 
Scully says with a sigh as she looks back into the 
room where Agent Doggett is. 

Harrison stares at her blankly. She can't believe 
what she just heard.

"What do you see in that pointy-eared guy?" Harrison 
asks.  
 
Scully looks back over at her.

"What do you *not* see?" Scully says, her attention 
going back to Doggett. "I mean, just look at him. The 
way he sits… his broad shoulders, his posture, the 
way he holds that case file… such a man."  
 
Scully gets a goofy grin on her face.

"But what about Mulder?!" Harrison asks, getting 
frustrated that Scully is falling for this guy.

"Ah, Mulder schmulder." Scully simply replies, not 
taking her eyes off of Doggett.

Harrison can't take it any longer and runs away.

CUT TO:

INT. LEYLA HARRISON'S BEDROOM – THAT NIGHT

Harrison is curled up on her couch, with a blanket 
around her. She's watching a video tape with a tissue 
box in one hand, and a photo-manipulation of Mulder 
and Scully in a heart-shaped frame in the other.

"See, you're carrying Mulder's child Scully." 
Harrison says, speaking to her TV set. "You guys had 
one lonely night together, and it was a miracle. Why 
are you falling for Agent Doggett? It just can't be." 

She brings a tissue to her eyes and cleans away her 
tears, then blows her nose.

"I know what I'll do. I'll go over to her apartment 
and have a little talk with her. I'll fix her then." 
Leyla says with a smile on her face.

CUT TO:

INT. SCULLY'S APARTMENT – LATER THAT NIGHT

Scully is sitting at her computer, looking up 
information about this new hot Agent Doggett.

"Hmm… name: John. Cute picture." Scully says, 
admiring his biography. "Oohh… U.S. Marine Corps…"

Scully gets a pondering look on her face.  
 
"Military men…" Scully says to herself. "I wonder if 
he's as good as Walter…"

Scully is interrupted by a knock at her door. She 
looks over at the door irritated. She gets up to 
answer it.

"Oh god." Scully says with an irritated tone as she 
puts her hand to her forehead as if she got a sudden 
headache. 

"Agent Scully, we need to talk." Leyla Harrison says, 
and steps past Scully and enters her apartment.  
 
"Who are you, and why are you here." Scully asks 
irritated. "I didn't invite you in. I'm busy." 

Harrison looks at Scully's computer.

"What are you looking at on your computer?" Harrison 
asks.

"It's nothing. Just getting to know the new task 
force leader." Scully says. "Can you leave?" 
 
"No." Harrison says. "What about Agent Mulder?"

"They're lookin' for him." Scully says, not really 
caring. "I'm sure he's fine. Walter said he was taken 
by an alien space craft. Knowing him, he's probably 
found Samantha and having fun pushing buttons he's 
not suppose to."

"It's because of this new guy." Harrison says. "I 
don't get it Agent Scully. You are going to be having 
Agent Mulder's baby."

"What?" Scully says, not knowing what she's talking 
about.

"Yes, I know Agent Scully. You and Mulder had one 
lonely night together." Harrison says.

"Yeah, playing Monopoly." Scully says, offended that 
Harrison would think that she and Mulder had sex 
together.

"I know you are just covering up because you don't 
want that new guy to know about your pregnancy and 
how much you are in love with Agent Mulder." Harrison 
assures her. "But I know, oh yes Agent Scully, I 
know."

Harrison smiles at her.

"You don't know anything." Scully says, getting very 
irritated. "I slept with the Cancer Man!"

Harrison goes pale at these words.

"I did. I shagged him rotten!" Scully says. "How else 
do you think I'm actually pregnant? Hello! I can't 
have children, and now I'm pregnant. The Smoking Man 
has power, and I'm not just talkin' about the power 
to help me conceive a child if you know what I mean."

Scully has a smirk on her face. Harrison doesn't know 
what to say.  
 
"But… but…" Harrison says.

"Now, if you don't mind leaving, I would like to get 
back to see the marital status on this Agent John 
Doggett." Scully says, pushing Leyla Harrison out of 
her apartment, making sure to lock the door 
afterwards.

Scully goes over to her window to make sure Harrison 
has left. But she sees someone watching her from 
outside her apartment. Scully thinks to herself, then 
picks up her phone and dials.
 
"John Doggett." Says Doggett over the phone.'

"Why are you spying on me?" Scully says accusingly.

"What?" Doggett asks. "I'm not spyin' on you."

"I know, I just wanted to hear your sexy deep rough 
voice." Scully says.

"Pardon me, Agent Scully?" Doggett says, not sure 
that he heard her right.
 
"I said, I just wanted to hear your sexy deep rough 
voice." Scully repeats herself.  
 
It's quiet on the other end for a beat.

"Agent Doggett?" Scully says.

"I'm still here." Doggett says.

"Are you alone?" Scully asks.

"Yeah, why?" Doggett answers.

"Oh, I was just wondering what you're wearin'…" 
Scully says in a sly tone.

Off her sly smile…

CUT TO: 
 
INT. DEPUTY DIRECTOR ALVIN KERSH'S OUTER OFFICE – 
NEXT DAY

Agent Leyla Harrison sits impatiently on the couch in 
the waiting area outside of Kersh's office. Judy 
looks at Harrison irritated, but is assured that 
she's not as irritated as Alvin Kersh is about to be. 

Kersh's office door opens.

"Agent Leyla Harrison," Kersh says with pain in his 
voice. "I can see you now."

He goes into his office and Leyla follows.

"Have a seat." Kersh says, signaling to the seat in 
front of his desk.

Harrison sits down.

"What do you want, Agent Harrison?" Kersh asks.

"I'm here to express my concern about Agent Scully." 
Harrison says.

"Oh?" 

"Yes, it seems she's falling in love with Agent 
Doggett." Harrison continues. "Now, you and I both 
know that Agent Scully is in love with Agent Mulder."

Kersh looks confused, where did she get that?

"Hmmm… She's falling in love with Agent Doggett?" 
Kersh asks.

"Yes." Harrison replies.

"Ok, I'll see what I can do for you." Kersh says. 
"You're dismissed if that's all you came here for."

"One more thing actually." Harrison says.

Kersh lets out an impatient sigh.

"What's that?" Kersh asks.

"Have we found Agent Mulder yet?" Harrison asks.

"No." Kersh replies.

Leyla Harrison looks deeply saddened.  
 
"Ok, I guess I'll have to continue to cry myself to 
sleep until he's found." Harrison says.

Kersh doesn't know what to think of this.

"Whatever, you can leave now." Kersh says.

TIME CUT TO:

INT. HOSPITAL – A FEW DAYS LATER

Agent Doggett steps out of Scully's hospital room and 
sees Agent Harrison.

"How is she?" Harrison asks.

"Are you family?" Doggett asks.

"No, just a fellow Special Agent." Harrison says.

"She's fine." Doggett answers.

"It's so sad, she was so close to finding Agent 
Mulder." Harrison says. "Now she'll be all alone in 
the basement…"

Harrison lets out a sigh.

"I wonder if I could ask Deputy Director Kersh for a 
transfer onto the x-files." Harrison says with 
inspiration in her eyes.

"Actually, I've been assigned to help out with the x-
files." Doggett says.

Harrison's eyes go wide and she begins to scream…

DISSOLVE CUT TO:

INT. KERSH'S OFFICE

Harrison's scream continues.

"Agent Harrison! Shut up!" Kersh says, with 
irritation in his voice.

"You said you were going to make sure that Agent 
Scully would realize her love for Agent Mulder! How 
dare you assign that new guy to the x-files!" 
Harrison yells at Kersh.

"I never said that." Kersh says calmly. "I said I 
would take care of things. I did. Agent Scully and 
Agent Doggett are partners now."

"NO-OOOOOOOOO!!" Harrison screams.

Kersh gives her a look, then pulls out his handgun 
from his desk drawer and shoots her into silence.

Until next time…

FADE OUT:

THE END.

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